posts from 2009 to 2015.
What
Hey it’s Monday again.
“..we are experiencing unusually high call volumes… ”
This interview is sooo over.
The ultimate lie.
Nice try, Coca-Cola.
This explains everything.
An alarming statistic.
That’s the spirit!
Hey Fellas, don’t forget!!
Stall Trek
These colors don’t run.
RBF (resting bitch face).
“You’ve made me the happiest trash panda in the world!”
D’OH!
“Well.. long story short, shit happened.”
When you’re too lazy to be lazy.
Would you like that freedom supersized?
No ice cream. No cigarettes. Yes unicorns.
Years of being lost have finally caught up to Waldo psychologically.
^^ Do you live inside a children’s book?
Battered chicken breast with thin russet potatoes on tomato purée, served with seasonal vegetables.
Here you go Mr. Withawhy, enjoy.
Oh no, that’s not a good sign.
Truth in advertising.
What a difference an inch makes..
Aww, look at those little bundles of joy.
**** Ticket #666 ****
Please have a seat and listen for your number to be called.
I don’t think that means what you think it means.
MINE.
“They see me rollin’…”
Meanwhile in Belgium. (video)
We’ll be okay.
Carchery.
Still think I’m faking it, mom?
Ruff neighborhood.
A message from God.
Don’t tell me how to live my life.
I think I found where 80’s action stars were made.
Get that weak ass shit outta here.
Here come all the distant relatives.
That’s great, but can he find sexy singles in my area?
Eat fiber.
Meanwhile in Minnesota.
So many awesome career options for girls today!
The original YouTube comments section.
Hold up… Heeeeeeeeey.
Chapter 1 - Establish dominance: pee on EVERYTHING
Still takes 8 months to finish.
Works better with the British pronunciation.
“Yeah mom I got to play today!”
Literal rebellion.
Hey baby, you awake?
♫ ♬ “.. ’Cause I’ve had the time of my life… ” ♫ ♬
Everyone loves dolphins… Everyone except Jeff.
It was a calculated risk.
Dear Mom and Dad, I got my big break in modelling today.
Doctor said it was just a rash.. ??
Haters going too hate.
Every Damn Day.
Have you tried unplugging and plugging it back in?
Like trying to fit into your high school pants.
Might be time for a rebrand.
Cool it, Darlene.
“Oh yeah, smear your hot black caulk all over me.”
We want to live too.
Louis Vulvatton
“We’ve upgraded you to a slower speed!”
Is Kanye the CEO of Uplay?
“Sweet photos man.”
Hadouken!!
Next time you’re having a bad day..
“Discipline must be maintained at all times.”
2 Girls No Cup
“whale, whale… this is how it ends.”
♫ ♬ It’s a big boat after all..
The Beatles lied!
That’s how I look while cooking bacon.
Bonersmile
Gimme some skin bro.
Centrum Silver® Surfer
There is hope after all.
Even that has been outsourced.
Are you drunk?
Mark y Mark
You know money is tight when… you have to borrow $3.
Wieners and losers.
I have some reservations about this joke.
Kneeopolitan
July 4th
Something’s afoot here.
For the lavatory is dark and full of terrors.
Reason #1: Wrong type of phone.
So has it been born or is she still pregnant?
The General Wee
The neighborhood is to die for.
“Elmo hugs back & so much more!”
America in four words.
I don’t want to tell you how to do your job, but……
Priority seating for the old, the pregnant and the pimps.
(no caption)
Agghh..
Bathwater is lava.
It can’t be right.
I’m sorry, your application has bin rejected.
Sikh hat, bro.
Strawbooty.
Do you drink coffee?
He really forked up.
Let’s keep this a secret between you and meat.
Harrison Ford teaches George Lucas how to reach the g-spot.
Ha-ha dumb bir… oh.
My parents say I was an accident.
Yes, yes.. give them all to me!
William, it was really nothing.
Dedicated to my family.
Still okay to eat?
*accepts without reading*
Everyday heroes.
A landfill victory for one candidate!
Not everyone appreciates a good Christmas jam.
A unicorn was born.
I mean “meow”.
There’s Jamaldo.
Shots fired.
Highlight of my day.
Plot twist: Phone number to alcoholics anonymous.
Stop your bitching.
They were all out of malice.
Canada has a serious epidemic.
Planting in the most peculiar way.
Sorry I’m late, got tied up on the subway..
A surprise for the next people who redo the carpet.